What is Christmas Without Fireworks, 'Bangers' and 'Knockouts'?

By the end of the yuletide season, without any doubts, a lot of people would have recorded a good number of ex-convicts in their various families. That is, if some families have not started counting or visiting police stations already.

Aha! Don't get it twisted. Before some of you (especially the religious fanatics) start saying 'God forbid', let me start by saying here that some of my relatives/family members are already ex-convicts along what I would term here as 'waka pass' ex-convicts! As we proceed, you will begin to have an understanding of what I mean by 'waka pass' ex-convicts.

First of all let me clarify that there are several levels of convicts ranging from 'waka pass' convicts to die-hard/hardened convicts.

A few weeks back Mr Solomon Arase, the Inspector General of Police reiterated the ban on firecrackers, fireworks, what a lot of people call 'knockouts' or 'bangers' (not the bangers pork sausages) during the forthcoming Christmas and New year celebrations given the current security level in different parts of the Country, adding that hoodlums have started the practice of using the fireworks to confuse citizens while carrying out despicable acts and thus warned that violators, that is those who would still use the banned fireworks while jubilating would be made to face the wrath of the law thereby becoming 'waka pass' or light offence convicts.

Over the weekend, driving through a neighbourhood where a small market is located, I saw a group of people arguing with some armed Police men who were trying to forcefully get a group of boys into their patrol van and some women who could pass for the mothers of the boys pleading with them to let the boys go even as the onlookers standing around with a few others who stood faraway talked in hushed tones obviously over why the boys were being arrested. My mission around there was to stop and buy a few food items but on a second thought decided not to stop but drove on as soon as I saw the scene.

And so for fear of being caught up in a potential calamity (given the guns) I stopped a good distance from the market in front of a roadside tomato seller who was also watching the scenario from afar. As I paid for some tomatoes she told me that the boys were getting picked-up by the Police for 'disturbing the peace of the community' with fireworks.

As soon as I heard that, I laughed and said "the Policemen have a lot of work to do given the case" as I remembered my relatives who were also arrested a few years ago for letting off fireworks and we had to bail all three of them with a lot of money that day and of course from that night because the trio did not sleep in the cells overnight given the light offence, they officially became the family's 'ex-convicts' but we termed them 'waka pass' just like some Nollywood's acts who just feature in a scene of a movie playing nearly insignificant roles in the entire movie.

Now you have an idea of who a 'waka pass' ex-convict  is, and also what I meant when I mentioned that "some of my relatives/family members are already ex-convicts", like I said before, don't get it TWISTED. They are just 'waka pass' not hardened ex-convicts okay?

So if you or your wards don't want to get on the list, tell them to stay away from 'bangers' this yuletide season so you (they) don't get 'banged' into the Trucks/Vans of the Armed Uniformed Men while heading for the Police Station/Cells. But on the other hand, all lovers of fireworks may want to ask "what is Christmas without these fireworks"?

Well my take is this, if you must do your 'KABOOM' fireworks, get ready for Prison and the wrath of the law as Arase has warned. Like I said earlier, because Christmas is only just starting and I know for a fact that there WILL be more fireworks and crackers, the Police force should therefore get set for a busy time this period until a few days into the new year as for a LOT of people, the season is NEVER complete without these 'BANGERS'.